”

Which brings me to the one succinct phrase that could keep the Democrats in power in 2012: “We’ll legalize pot.” I’m not saying this just to get cheap applause. I’m saying it because reliable surveys tell us that there’s only one thing that will rouse our precious youth to the polls the way Jackass in 3D got them out to the theaters, and that’s pot. It’s the unwritten second half of Obama’s slogan. “Yes We Can…Get High at the Mall.”

In the legalization of marijuana, the Democrats finally could have something they’ve always wanted: a wedge issue. Remember wedge issues? Things like gay marriage and prayer in school and other bullshit that Republicans used for years to get hillbillies to the polls? That’s how Bush got elected in 2004 — Karl Rove put gay marriage on the ballot in eleven key states, knowing that all the Christian shit-kickers would come out against boys kissing and stick around to pull the lever for Bungles the Clown.

Nationwide, young people 18-29 are expected to make up just six percent of those voting in the midterms. Six percent! I’ve seen more young people than that at Larry King’s canasta parties. But here in California, where Proposition 19 on the ballot would legalize weed, the kids are expected to make up twelve percent of the voters. Still pathetic: but to go from six percent to twelve percent, that’s…well, I’m a little stoned right now, but a lot.

Bill Maher: New Rule: Christine O’Donnell Has to Stop Saying “I’m You” in Her Campaign Ads